Tag Archives: dreams

THE REVELATION JOURNALS I-VII

THE REVELATION JOURNALS I-VII

November 4, 2009

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These are the journals associated in part with The Revelation Painting.

The blogs are rough drafts of sections of the journals which will be published after the painting is released (projected release dates for the journals: 12/2013-2015). I have chosen to publish these blogs and not keep them private as it will give the audience an opportunity to learn and grow with The Revelation Painting in this last year which I term: The Finale’.

The blogs are in no particular order visible to you but they are being separated into their respective journals behind the scenes. These journals hold several mysteries unveiled in The Book of Revelation from the bible which have been missed throughout history and once revealed will change history as we know it. So you are reading history in the making!

The Revelation Painting is created for the people of the globe and for the past eleven years, people have participated in its creation. The overall endeavor is to create visual peace in these times of turmoil throughout the world. It is an opportunity to focus on something beautiful and designed to place the viewer in awe. Please see the blog about the painting at:www.therevelationpainting.wordpress.com

The Journals included with this painting are as follows:

Journal I The Journal of Dreams

This journal summarizes where and how the painting originated, the initial attempts at its creation, essentially the beginning of the work through its completion. Background on the artist, past experiences, current experiences and thoughts, ideas and feelings while working on this masterpiece are captured within the pages of the journal. It contains rare insight into an artist mind while working on a masterpiece!

Journal II The Journal of Visions

Exploring imagination and visually preparing for this huge project, the journal recalls where the vision arose and how it developed throughout the twelve total years required to complete The Revelation Painting. It explores the artist views and personal battles with religion, God, the “calling” as a messenger to complete this massive religious painting.

Journal III Journal of Measures

The Journal of Measures covers not only the grids and precise measurement required for a 12 foot by 40 foot creation, but the numbers and coincidences found throughout the twelve years required to complete the painting. Small sketched works were required to become at times “larger than life”. The journal is in graph form to help facilitate readability and understanding of the creative and sometimes scientific processes required to manually enlarge drawings without the aid of electronics or other artificial means.

Journal IV Journal of Sketches

Preliminary thoughts are sketched and worked through in order to create the perfect scene, exactly how the artist conceptualized the painting upon completion. Starting often times as merely stick images, working through to the completed characters or scenes. The journal also includes required experimentation to create a painting which would be durable enough to withstand the test of time, e.g., the effects of the raw mineral sulfur and its acidic effects on cloth canvas.

Journal V The Stones

In depth coverage regarding the stones of the twelve foundations noted in The New City are covered in this journal. Geological, metaphysical, spiritual and origins are also covered. Stories about global participation in obtaining the stones are also covered. Tools, lacquer, and very significant mystery of Revelation is disclosed in this journal.

Journal VI Truth-The Hemorrhage of Pigs!

The artist reveals the profound change made in the painting in 2009 and how it occurred. Where religion became political and how it forced the artist to find a way to make the painting stay in its original religious state, yet in moments change into a political piece revealing corruption and essentially crimes against humanity! This is the climax behind the story of The Revelation Painting which will shock and astound followers of the series when it is realized that there has been a battle of good and evil within the painting the entire time! The painting bleeds-a hemorrhage and returns to its normal state right in front of your eyes!

Journal VII Journal of Acknowledgement

This is the journal where all participants globally are acknowledged for their participation in the project and completion of The Revelation Painting. A one page advertising area is offered (text only, no photography), to advertise business, make a statement to the world, or anything the author wishes. Contributions can range from a comment, marketing, to sponsorship or obtaining materials. Everyone is acknowledged, some to the point of limited ownership of a random section of the painting!

The journal titles are written in english and subtitles of the journals as well as subtitles of the scenes of the painting are written in random languages. The journals will be designed appropriately and with the highest hand quality a painting such as The Revelation Painting deserves and designed to last more than a lifetime.

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Side Note:  HAPPY ST. PATRICK’S DAY!

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The Journal of Dreams 02/06/2010

My endeavor was and is to write everyday this last year of the painting to show how life and work; dreams and goals are affected by everyday life.  Today this is the effect:  I received a call from the new manager allowing me to work as an agency nurse to make some money before I start the job to catch up on the bills already due.  Agency allows next day or rapid pay, so what hours I work today are paid to me tomorrow, therefore I can pay the bills.  Once I start the job, I do not get paid for 2 weeks, so life and work is  a priority.  The next few days will be sparse for writing because work starts today!

The Journal of Dreams 02/04/2010

Self evaluation has been on my mind lately.  I am getting old and since I work in healthcare, it is easily seen how diseases eat away at life.  Lately I have felt very fatigued which I contribute to smoking too many cigarette really.  When I am at home smoking is far more than at work.  At work, I smoke 3 cigarettes in 12 hours, maybe 4, but at home, I smoke a pack and sometimes two throughout the day when I am off.  Working or not, a carton of cigarettes are smoked a week, sometimes more.

Also, I am heavy, too heavy for a healthy body.  Although I do not think my cholesterol is high due to limited red meat intake, I am fat.  My job is very stressful.  That being said, there is one more thing.  I am female and am reaching the age where menopause starts.  For a woman, when menopause occurs important hormones end which protect us from heart disease.  Since heart disease is prevalent in my family, I now have a higher risk of death!

So I have four critical risk factors that are certainly killers.  It is time to make some changes.  It would be hell to complete this painting after all these years and fall over dead.  Just as I have made plans for this painting, essentially it has taught me a form of discipline by following through on goals in certain timeframes.  It is important to make certain goals for extending my life because now, I am a “dead man walking” and I am quite positive that is a fact.

Today I am not painting or working on the journals.  I am writing this blog then setting a course for victory against an adversary, what my mother called “the boogeyman”.  She told me a long time ago that he was after me which was quite disturbing but I looked at it with the typical:  “Yea sure, that happens to other people” attitude.  I’ve seen enough to know that if it isn’t you or the guy down the street, it is me…I am the other person.

I used to be quite athletic.  I was the pitcher for my softball team, used to run like the wind and was the fullback on the soccer team.  I won the trophy in high school for arm wrestling and beating everyone, male and female.  I was the greatest tomboy and fearless.  Not to admit to ever breaking the law, I could say that one time “I dreamt of driving a car 168 miles an hour”…;)  That would have been a foolish thing to do.  There is a value on life and today I will acknowledge it.

The Journal of Dreams 02/01/2010

THANK GOD FOR CRAFT STORES!!!

I found myself slipping on the ice driving too fast to try to get to the craft store near my home in search of acrylic flakes of hologram.  I remember thinking it’s not worth a crash but then I remembered thinking Oh yes it is!  I was fearless relying on the greatest backer of this painting to keep me safe.  I imagined God watching me drive so fast on ice to get what I needed and shaking his head with a conniving grin on his face whispering “easy boy, easy”.

The size is big enough to capture the rainbow effect I am seeking.  They are like magnified glitter chunks ranging in geometric shapes around 4mm in size.  Seemingly slightly crushed and flattened back out, the minute creases and ridges capture and hold light from all angles so that the rainbow effect is luminous!  I will use this if nothing better can be found.  I had a dream last night about aurora borealis which is the coating (rainbow effect) on rhinestone.

Hours were spent looking at some of the most magnificent rhinestone in the world.  I found myself fascinated and thinking about all kinds of designs unrelated to The Revelation Painting.  I even downloaded a program which cuts stones in various faceted shapes.  Planning ahead to be a stone cutter, I was really caught up in the beauty of it all.  I deleted that program this morning as much as I want to do so many things, I just don’t have the time.

About seven years ago I was applying for Law School and was accepted in California.  I thought I could make the porcelain dolls I dreamed of in my spare time while working fulltime and going to Law School.  I even bought the books for the first 2 semesters, expensive business suits, a new computer…I was ready!  Then I entered an art show and was accepted.  Being encouraged to have the opportunity to do paint, my true passion, I dropped Law School.

I wrote some of the biggest art galleries in New York and after 6 weeks heard back and I was accepted for an entire year in residency.  Thinking my life would change I made frivolous plans to move to Manhattan.  I planned everything out, called “reputable” movers and got quotes, budgeted my money and waited until the last day on my lease to leave.  I had gotten rid of all my furniture and made my load fit in a 14 foot truck.

I took a travel job with good pay and the housing was set up, I googled and mapquested the area, the plans, and it seemed as though it would be a smooth transition.  I had money to last us a month or so, fill the new place with food, had maps of the subway system, planned to “go green” and stop driving and polluting the air.  Everything was set up perfectly and we were excited to get on the road and start our new lives!

The mover came and the quote changed to 4 times more than what he had originally quoted.  I did not have the money for that and I was as mad as hell.  That being said, I put everything my daughter and I owned in local storage with plans to get it out within two weeks.  We stuffed the car with what would fit and headed to Manhattan.  It took 4 days driving across the country to live my dreams.  I had never been to Manhattan…that was my first mistake.

We arrived and moved into a box of an apartment, essentially a storage room set up like an Ikea magazine ad.  It is amazing that a 300sf room can be labeled a one bedroom apartment!  I knew we were in trouble.  People don’t really drive in Manhattan and if they do, they pay around $400.00 or more a month to park their car in a garage because there is no place else to park it.  We lived within walking distance of SoHo, where the gallery was that accepted my art.

Needless to say, everything went wrong.  My car was robbed, I couldn’t get to the job by driving and going under the ground in the subway system was a nightmare.  I didn’t know where I was, where I was going, if my daughter was Ok…I tried to “be strong” but found myself in the absolute worst mess I had ever gotten myself into in my life!  One evening my daughter and I walked over to the gallery.  I remember seeing a sign that said by appointment only…I sat down and cried.

I never contacted the gallery.  My art was in storage 4 days away and I could not get it and even if I could there was no place to put it, I would end up leaving it somewhere.  My dreams were shattered, I had screwed up beyond screwing up.  Two years ago I finally got back to our belongings and put them into a truck promising I would never leave them behind again.  When I saw my art I cried so hard I lost my breath.

The Journal of Dreams 01/28/2010

I had a dream last night that the black horse had wings like a bird!  Not like an angel but huge wings that carried his 9 foot body effortlessly.  They were black with blue in them like crows wings and when he flapped them to fly it made a thundering noise.  He had no rider and smoke came from his nostrils because he was flying so fast as though his mission was more than what his body could handle.  His urgency caused him to fly hard and fast often taking time to glide in order to rest.

I was standing in a field of tall grass and when I saw him in the sky, his passage in front of the sun caused a great shadow on the ground.  The grass moved in waves from the turbulence his wing created.  I looked up and could see the fury in his green eye, like panic.  I ran as fast as I could to jump and fly with him but could not get off the ground.  Falling, I grabbed hold of the grass to hold on as I had run to the edge of the world and was about to fall…in that moment I woke up.

My heart was pounding and I felt sadness, not fear.  My sadness came from my inability to fly and catch up with him.  It was as though his eyes pleaded with me to help him with his mission but I was unable to get my feet off the ground.  He looked back and saw me fall but had to continue without me and I understood.  It was though he knew that I had given all I had but it was not enough.  I wonder what that dream meant?  Too much television?

The Journal of Dreams 01/24/2010

I was awake 24 hours trying to work and research the faces of the creatures connected to me since childhood.  I dreamt of them for a long, long time but never understood why.  Researching them and looking into their eyes, may help me to understand.  During my research time, I unburied my colored pencils knowing I would need them for the eyes of the creatures.  I sat sharpening hundreds of colored pencils getting them ready.  It’s been too long since I used them and I missed them.

What I have come up with so far is that the six wings of each creature will have multicoloured eyes representing every race and nationality.  There maybe eyes of every color of the rainbow-natural or not.  To relieve wasting paint, I think I will mix colors into colors until I get to “mud” which is a term used when mud color results from many colors mixed together.  It is a tragedy in painting unless you are looking for it.  In this case I will need the browns.

I also went to look at feathers today.  There are some magnificent feathers out there!  I was draw to the peacock of course but the eyes at the ends will clash with the humanistic eyes I am striving to create.  The fancy feathers also appealed to me, like the ones which sit on top of the head like a mohawk, but they would be difficult to place as they are meant to stand straight up.  I will look on Ebay for feather sellers and see what is there.

The Journal of Dreams 01/21/2010

I spent the majority of the day looking at the faces of lions, calf’s, and eagles.  These are extremely beautiful animals!  I also researched meaning and perceived meanings of The Four Living Creatures.  I found other parts where they are mentioned but the description is different.  I am wondering what these creatures truly represent but more so wondering what my personal connection to them are.  These are the creatures I have dreamed about since I was a child and through all the photos I have searched, there are no similarities from any other artist’ that come close to what I imagined they look like.

I learned a lot from painting the black horse and being unprepared.  I cannot repaint the creatures over and over because I am using real feathers for their wings in some places.  It seems like all the art I have done throughout my life is somehow tied to this painting.  I used feathers in several paintings depicting angels of one sort or another.  Feathers are hard to manage, you have to put down an adhesive and gently work the feather into it with a stiff brush to capture the detail of each individual line which make up the feather itself.  They are very delicate and need patience which is a lacking attribute for me.

Painting eyes on feathers might pose a critical problem.  Even placing the feathers might cause degradation after time since they are carbon based (once living).  Hopefully the lacquer will seal them forever leaving minimal opportunity for deterioration.  I might consider painting feathers under them in case they deteriorate.  White feathers are the best, then from what I learned about highlighting to created depth in texture from the sky, I can color them grey, or other colors and the white is like fresh, white canvas allowing the actual color to show in its brilliant and true pigment.

The Journal of Dreams-The Finale’

Today marks the twelfth year of the making of The Revelation Painting.  The official website goes up today and there have been countless hours spent looking forward and preparing for today.  I cannot believe today is here!  Although it is exciting, it is scary as well.  Today the realization hit me that it is serious now, more serious than it had been for these twelve years.  My mission is now etched in concrete and I alone am the master of its destiny.  What will it be like to awaken to the painting away from me a year from now, for the first time as it travels the world?  Like a child leaving home for the first time, I know it will sicken me.  What will it be like to go to sleep and not see the visions of what to paint tomorrow?

Time and creation is an odd thing for the human psyche.  This painting has become a part of me, my companion that I have toted with me for a lifetime.  Panic has not set in yet as I continue to enjoy the time I have to make this painting come alive.  I wonder if Michelangelo felt this way when he had to let go of his most magnificent works…forever?  Although I planned for the painting to travel to world with its messages, the world seems like a very huge place now and in the light of recent events globally, what if the turmoil of a country had a direct impact on the survival of the painting?  I just keep imagining pieces of the painting scattered among the ruins of a once vibrant city…an artist’ imagination.

Let me live for today and not let my imagination spoil my dreams.  Today will be spent with constant updating of social pages to increase the flow of people, awareness of the painting and to create a following.  I had run ads for a marketer who would work in their spare time (currently without pay), to promote the painting but received no response.  I can understand that simply because it is not their dream.  I imagine the value of the painting will soar and we could have made an arrangement.  Nevertheless, I will market it as best I can and try to build a network, offer incentives and maybe even ownership of pieces of the painting for a limited time.  That way people who are in need, will receive but not as charity.

Today is the first day of the rest of my life and yesterday is gone forever.  There are many things to do, many plans to make, secrets and mysteries to blend into the painting and time continues to tick forward.  Life truly passes in the blink of an eye, and before I know it, this year will end and it would seem as though a dream.  I am up for the challenge and will consciously acknowledge everyday, several times a day so that it does not pass in the blink of an eye for me.  It is important to become organized and follow a strategic plan, to have goals and meet them, evaluate and reevaluate.  Today I will create a mission statement and follow it, I will look at the painting as not just art but as a business.