Started working on the Journal of Sketches some today to try to figure out these Four Living Creatures and their placement in the painting. For sure, I will change the colors of the wings in each creature. I am afraid my boredom will get in the way of progress. I keep the canvas for Babylon near by just in case. There is a lot of intricate work to do on that scene.
I was thinking a lot about my father today. He is old now, 82. I see a lot of people his age dying and I will miss him terribly. He has been a major resource for me with the technical side of the painting, but moreover my life. How many times do we think in our lives: “I wish I would have spent more time with them?” There is nothing keeping me from that really, just the risk of being trapped.
One time we were talking about “Cowboys”. Since he was raised poor and on country music, he see’s a Cowboy as a rebel, a loner, and they have a good heart but a restless spirit. I guess I see them that way too. I told him I was going to get a red tattoo in block letters on my bicep that said: COWBOY. He laughed and said that I was a Cowboy.
Somehow I felt that I was going to cry because in that moment I realized that he does have some understanding of me if he knew that I considered myself as a Cowboy and that when he looked into my eyes as a baby, he must have known it then and that what I thought was “treating me bad”, was actually him teaching me what I would need to survive. He must have known some Cowboys in his life.